From my childhood, I wanted to do things differently. I have always wanted to avoid the middle-class, SUV-driving, blond-haired, manicured, but not quite thin, stay-at-home soccer mom cliche that the world hates on so much. I didn't want to be a "momzilla". Essentially, a woman who went crazy because she was a full-time mom, not because she wanted to be, but because she had to be.
As an "independently-minded" young adult,
Some of these ideas were based off of people that I knew, others are stereotypes, and none of it was probably a completely accurate image of what life as a mom was like.
Nonetheless, here I am several years later, a wife, a mother, an SUV-driver, and (hopefully) a soon-to-be homeowner. I am a full-time mom, and I work part-time and attend school part-time. I am on my way to becoming what I never wanted to be. I spend a lot of my time at home. I've been at it for 7-months, and I often wonder, can I really do this for the rest of my life? Some days, I love being able to spend so much time with my adorable son, who brings me more happiness than anything in the world. But other days, I feel the suburban complacency is curling around me- like a boa constrictor in the process of preparing dinner.Some days, I'm just bored. Not in the sense that I don't have enough to do- I have plenty to do. I am lacking in intellectual stimulation and challenges.
I openly admit it. I am high energy, easily-bored, hyperactive, whatever you want to call it. Not just physically, but mentally and intellectually. I can't drink caffeine. As in, CANNOT. I have way too much energy without it. Plus, I am afraid that I will be suspected of snorting cocaine...
Why do I write this overly-parenthetical monologue?
This is to say that I am in search of the right path for me, balancing my parenting beliefs and my life-style needs. Teeter-tottering amidst career-oriented and family oriented. This is to say that I am less than three semesters away from graduating, and what's next?
Can I have it all?
I heard a celebrity mom who had an illustrious career once say, "You can have it all, just not at the same time."
And just for clarification...
-This is not a moral or religious debate concerning stay-at-home moms.
-Nor is this to say that I don't enjoy domestication. (I love me some Martha).
-I LOVE being a mother, and would have a slew of children if I could. Dmitri is my greatest accomplishment, my greatest joy, and nothing will make me as happy as he does.
-I stereotyped a lot in this post. I am sorry.
-I don't snort cocaine.
-I think roses and picket fences are pretty.
To tie it up:
Do you think you can have it all? What are your priorities? Whatever you do, whether a mom or a career-woman, or a combination...are you fulfilled, happy, bored, etc?